One Month

Well, this is a bit depressing...because at first glace...you probably can't tell much difference...but if you look closely....i've got less tummy, less chin...haha and sadly less boobs! This is me after about 30lbs of loss. My scale decided to "adjust" itself the other day, so I'm in a bit of a plateau this week. Hormones and other things are affecting my weight too...so today is a good day to focus on those wonderful things called NSV's, or Non-Scale Victories. So far the biggest NSV's for me are:

1. No longer have to take diabetes meds..yippee!

2. My knees don't hurt as much when climbing stairs.

3. I was able to walk outside for 30 minutes in flat dress shoes and not feel like my feet were going to fall off when i got home.

4. Making a meal last for 3 days...can we say saving $!

I wouldnt be me though if I didn't list some of the down sides...to balance things out...

1. Getting sick and throwing up after I eat a favorite meal. This sucks big time. It has to do with eating too fast...and i should be able to control it, but so far, it's a struggle.

2. Scabs...sutures...itchy scars...yuck.

3. It's just not possible for me to drink 64 oz of anything in a day.

4. People asking you "what's the number", especially on a week where you've only lost a pound or two.

Okay, but I have to end things on a positive note...I have to say it really made me feel good when one of my friends said I was "disappearing in front of his eyes"...even though an exaggeration...it made me feel better in a week where my scale decided to adjust upwards, making it harder for me to lose..haha...and it was an added boost. Also, my clothes are getting very baggy, and that's kind of cool too. I still have about 120 lbs to go, but at the end of the day...it's a good start!!

Food-wise...I think I need to eat more. My body has become used to the daily 2 protein supplements then dinner. It probably would be better if I ate my big meal at lunch...but that is at work...and I hate surprises or puking at work. I think next month I will go to the support group meeting and talk about it. In the mean time, I think I'm going to try to have real food for breakfast and dinner and see how things shake out:-)

So all in all, it's been a great month...a fast recovery without complications, thank God.

Ups and Downs

The past few days have been somewhat of an experiment in what exactly constitutes full liquids. The other day I tried an egg custard, and I think...not liquid enough probably. I also found that drinking the ready made Instant Breakfast drinks are with a higher milk fat percentage...because they instantly made me feel ill. Luckily I haven't thrown up since I've come home. However, I've learned there's an important price to be paid if you eat wrong. If you eat something that makes you nauseous...you can't even drink water for a little while after...which makes it very hard to get in the required drinking to keep hydrated. One thing that has saved me I think the past few days are those protein bullet things. At least I know if I can get one of those down first thing in the morning...I've got 42 grams of protein in me. That's a great start.

I've also been feeling a little guilty about not moving enough. It's hard because it seems if I go out in the living room I'm being exposed to food. This is torture right now. Last night they got Chinese...I mean I went in the kitchen and felt like I was in a mine field in Nam. Luckily, I have discovered my post op favorite food from the Chinese foray. Egg Drop Soup. 8 oz of Egg Drop Soup contains 13 grams of protein. There is something about the consistency and taste that totally agree with my stomach...praise God. I had some yesterday and today, and I actually feel like I've eaten.

Now onto somewhat disgusting parts of this recovery process. You have to leave your steri strips on until they fall of...and you can only lightly wash your stomach with liquid dial soap. Luckily none of my wounds seems to be infected so far and my drain hole is closing up nicely. There are some righteously ugly bruises all colors of the rainbow around them though. Also...let's talk about bowel movements...let's just say they are explosive and strange....a combination of gas and flakes of who knows what...but thank goodness not with the usual accomanying cramps of diarrhea. So I can't say it's diarrhea...just weird. I will say when I ate that Egg Drop Soup...I did gain something more substantial. I now know why they want you to stay home the first 3-4 weeks...I cannot imagine having to have one of these mid-meeting....fun.

But all in all...I'm having an amazing recovery. I don't feel any different really. I just get full fast...and a little twinge if I take too big a drinks. I'm looking forward to my surgeon appointment tomorrow...yippeee...if he clears me...I move on to soft foods...we're talking CHILI...haha. But I now know...be prepared for a step forward and a step back if something doesn't agree with you. You can always fall back on a crystal light/broth day if things get too hairy.

And as far as movement...I started walking today. I walked 15 minutes on the treadmill at like 1.7 miles an hour...and this made me sweat and a little dizzy. You just have to be careful when you're only going on like 300 calories, and your body is still trying to heal. I'll try again tomorrow, just so I can say I'm trying;-)

Valentine's Day Torture

Okay... Day four on the recovery train, and I have to say that I have been tortured. My husband decided last night that he needed to make cupcakes for my son's class. On top of that, he made chicken marsala which is my favorite. My husband and I are not on the greatest of terms...so I'm wondering how much of this is subliminally torture. So I hid in my room drinking yummy crystal light and broth...woohoo! On top of it all, Cole is running in with candy bags for his class. You'd think after having your guts rearranged, you wouldn't have a desire for this stuff...WRONG!. The infamous HEAD HUNGER you've read about is insidious. It's the feeling of course like you want something, but in your stomach you know you couldn't eat it if you wanted to. I mean your stomach is bursting at this point from a few sips of water, but your mind is craving all those delicious foods that used to make you feel good, feel full, feel better. My biggest struggle with food is emotional eating. In the coming months, along with chronicaling my journey with gastric bypass surgery, I'm also going to journal about my internal struggle with overcoming emotional hunger. I recently got a good book called, Eating in the Light of the Moon, by Anita Johnston, PH.D. The book uses myth and metaphor, along with solid therapeutical approaches to teach people how to identify their problems with food an emotional eating. Here's a link to the book:Eating by the Light of the Moon

This week the focus of course is getting in fluids so I don't dehydrate. I managed 44 oz Wednesday, and 55 oz yesterday. Today (Friday), I'm trying to focus on both hydration and protein. I started out with a protein bullet, which are these big test tubes with this juice that tastes like jello water. They are thick and sweet, so I recommend cutting them with an ice cube to keep them cold and a little watered down while you drink them. They are worth the trouble... 42 g of protein in one shot. The rest of the day I'm alternating between drinking/eating something with protein and then drinking a glass of water. Another good trick is taking a sugar free pudding and mixing with half a scoop of Any Whey flavorless protein powder. It tastes ok, and boosts the protein content of the pudding to like 16 g. Very cool.

I haven't had to take my pain medicine much. My mom who is a nurse recommends I take a half dose morning and evening to deal with the overall discomfort. I wouldn't so much describe it as pain, so much as an uncomfortable pulling sensation. Also I've noticed when I'm stressed out, my stomach hurts instantly....so if you can protect yourself from stress in these early days of recovery for sure.

I have the book from http://www.bariatriceating.com called Before and After. The book is pretty good at answering questions you have about gastric bypass and also has a ton of recipes. My goal next week on my second week in recovery is to make a couple recipes from this book. Next week if all goes well in my post op visit I'll be able to start on soft foods. My goal is to be varied and not get stuck in a rut. I'm going to learn to eat fish more, and not be lazy about cooking.

Well, back to sipping my water....